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Every language community in the world possesses its own way of greeting people in the society. The modes of greeting differ from one language community to another language community. This linguistic trait is strongly embedded in the language and culture of that society. The modes of greeting have their own value in the sociology of language. Greeting is not only essentially satisfying for the socio-psychological need of the people in a given society but it is also a component of religious norm. This religious norm is governed by the situations in which the greeter says what is expected by the greetee in one way or another.
Modes of greeting are used in a society by the individual either to welcome or to say good-bye. Keeping in view the preceding contention, in this write up attempt is made to discuss different types of greeting forms used by the native speakers of Urdu. The research study is fully based on the researcher’s observations. It is hoped that this study will highlight certain interesting linguistic features in the utterances used by the native speakers of Urdu in their day-to-day greetings. Greeting could be Verbal and Non-Verbal.
We find that in every greeting situation, two persons come in contact in a particular ethnic situation, which is characterized by means of some paralinguistic features like gestures, statement etc. Goffman (1963: 91) has called it an ‘ethnography of encounter’. Both verbal and non-verbal types of greeting can either be formal or informal. Verbal greetings appear in the form of utterances. The varied forms of verbal greetings like assalām-o-alaikum, salām-o-alaikum, salamālekum, salākūm etc. are frequently used by Urdu speakers in everyday communication, whereas non-verbal forms of greeting include gestures like lifting the right hand up to the forehead, smiling, nodding, hugging, closing of eyes and twinkling of eyes, etc. Though there is a difference between these two types of greeting, both of them are characterized by social setting, context and interpersonal relationships. Mostly non-verbal greeting gestures and verbal greeting utterances are combined in an actual situation. Both verbal and non-verbal greetings are used in different kinds of formal and informal situations.
In normal day-to-day interaction when an individual meets his elder then he uses formal verbal form like |assalām-o-alaikum| ‘God (Allah) bless you’. But between two friends or two persons possessing the equal status formal verbal forms like:
/salām-o-alaikūm/ ‘God (Allah) /salāmālekūm/ ‘bless you’
are used. Both these forms frequently occur in day-to-day social interaction.
In Urdu speaking community (Muslim Culture) gestures like lifting of the right hand up to the forehead and hand shake, etc. are very commonly used for greetings but other gestures like bowing, touching of feet, kissing on the forehead are not at all found. Also in certain formal situation greetee and greeter shake each other with both the hands. This type of greeting is not found among all the Muslims. The shaking of hand with two hands and also with one hand have been observed. These two ways of shaking hand is clearly demarcated on the basis of different sects in Muslim community. A sect called Jamāt-e-Ahlehadīs (one who follows the Hadīs, sayings of Prophet) shakes hand only with the one hand. Another sect in Muslim, called Barelvi, use both their hands and then they put the hands on their chest. The shaking of hand has been a bone of contention between this sect of Muslim and the remaining religious group. Both these groups have strong Islamic arguments on this, and each sect believes that his way of greeting is correct or Islamic. Sometimes in Muslim community, the two friends of equal status greet each other by verbal greeting forms as well as by non-verbal gestures like hand shake and putting on the back, etc. It is to be pointed out here that when there is intimacy between the two persons (greeter and greetee) age factor does not come in such situations.
In every culture, greetings are related with etiquettes. Greeting has no value unless a person has proper etiquettes. For instance, refusal to extend one’s hand for hand shake and turning one’s face away from the greeter will amount to bad etiquette in a greeting situation and in the verbal greeting not responding to the greeter’s verbal form like assalām-o-alaikūm gives bad signal to the greeter. Although the greeter understands the meanings of the greetee’s silence that something is wrong. The silence of the greetee amounts to bad etiquette in a greeting situation.
Generally in a formal situation a greeter slightly bends down while shaking hands with the greetee. This gesture of the greeter shows extra politeness and respect. This phenomenon of bending down is very common in a situation when a person meets a respected religious person. When a Muslim meets such a kind of person he gives more and more respect and attempts to create more affection and attachments with such person.
It is imperative to point out here that forms of verbal greeting like assalām-o-alaikūm, etc are intentionally avoided while taking lunch, dinner, etc. because of religious norm. It is prohibited by Islam. In this situation instead of uttering any verbal greeting, the greetee normally utters forms like āiyee khāna khāiyee ‘come and take food’ (a polite utterance) noosh farmaiyee, etc. and in response to this the greeter normally says bārakallah. Even during prayers such greetings are avoided, as it may cause disturbance to others. It is also due to religious norms. Physical distance and intensity of emotions between two persons also prevent the use of verbal greetings. In such situations, non-verbal greetings like facial gestures, smiling, nodding of head, lifting and waving of hands are commonly used. One peculiar feature regarding greeting in Urdu community is that anybody who meets a person will utter atleast assalām-o-alaikūm. This is required in most situations before starting a conversation. In Urdu community, like verbal greetings, non-verbal greetings are also used in formal as well as in informal situations appropriate to contexts. We notice two types of greeting in this community. These are:
1. Fixed greetings and 2. Alternative greetings.
In fixed greetings, most of the response can be predicted, whereas in alternative greetings responses may vary from person to person and according to situation.
Assalām-o-alaikūm and salāmoalaikūm are the frequently used fixed greetings forms between two persons. But the form assalām-o-alaikūm < Insert Picture > is more frequently used in formal situations, whereas the form salāmoalaikūm is often used in informal situations. This form is used generally among friends, colleagues, acquaintances or someone of equal status. The form salākūm has also been observed but its use has different pragmatic reason.
Urdu speakers also use the form ādābarz as part of fixed greeting form in addressing the member of the other religious group, and in response, the greetee utters the same form. But when an Urdu speaker (greeter) utters the form assalām-o-alaikūm, the greetee normally says or utters vālaikūmassalām in response to this.
It has been observed that Urdu speakers address a non Muslim by using the form namastee or namashkār. Sometimes instead of namastee or namashkār, forms like ahā ahā and oho oh, etc. are also used by Urdu speakers as greeting forms.
Alternative greetings are of two types:
1. Formal alternative greetings 2. In-formal alternative greetings
The expressions used for alternative greetings may be to enquire about general well being of the addressee, indicate respect towards the addressee, indicate affection, good wishes or blessing from elders for young ones. The illustrative examples of formal and in-formal alternative greetings expressions are given below:
Greeter Greetee 1. /kiyā hāl chāl hai ? 1a. /Thīk hai/ ‘All right’ ‘How are you?’ 1b. /āpkī duā hai/ ‘your blessing is with me’ 1c. /āpkī duāeeN haiN/ ‘your blessings are with me’ 1d. /āp buzurgooN kī duāeeN haiN/ ‘the blessings of you people (elders) are with me’ 1e. /āpkī meeharbānī hai/ ‘your kindness is with me’ 1f. /āpkī duāooN see Thīk hūN/ ‘I am fine with your blessings’ 1g. /alhamdoolillāh/ ‘Praise to God (Allah)’ 1h. /allāh kā shukr hai/ ‘Thanks to God’ 1i. /allāh kee fazlookaram see Thīk hūN/ ‘I am fine by the grace of God (Allah) 1j. /allāh kā karam hai/ ‘It is a kindness of God (Allah)’ 1k. /allāh kī meehaharbāni hai/ ‘It is a kindness of God (Allah)’ 1l. /mai Thīk see hūN, āp apni sunāiyee/ ‘I am fine, you tell me about yourself’ 2. /kaisī guzar rahi hai/ 2a. /allāh ka karam hai/ ‘How is life passing?’ ‘It is the kindness of Allah (God)’ 3. /kaisī kaT rahī hai/ 3a. /āpki duā see Thīk hī kaT rahī hai/ ‘How is life going?’ ‘It is going on well with your blessing’
In Urdu community, we observe the informal alternative greeting forms most commonly among friends.
4. /kiyā hāl chāl hai/ 4 a. /maiN too Thīk hūN apnī sunāoo/ How are you? ‘I am fine, (you) tell about yourself’ 4 b. /tumhārī duā see Thīk hūN/ ‘I am fine with your blessing’ 4 c. /allāh kā shukr hai/ ‘Thanks to God’ 4 d. /allāh kā karam hai/ ‘God’s grace’ 5. /sunā hai xūb mazee mār rahee hoo/ 5 a. /arree aisi kooī bāt nahi hai/ ‘I have come to know that you are enjoying’ ‘Oh, this is not so’ 6. /aur sunāoo kaisa chal rahā hai/ 6 a. /tumhārī duā see Thīk chal rahā hai/ ‘And, how things are going on’? ‘Things are going on fine with your blessing’. 7. /aur kaisee hoo/ 7 a. /sab Thīk hai/ ‘And how are you’? ‘Everything is allright’ 7 b. /mai too Thīk hūN apnī sunāoo/ ‘I am fine, you tell about you’
In Urdu community, we find that welcome forms, combined with terms for good wishes, are also used as modes of greeting. The illustrative examples are given below:
8. /āiyee, tāshrīf rakhiyee/ ‘Come and be seated’ 9. /hazrat, tashrīf farmāeeN/ ‘Sir, please be seated’ (very respective word) 10. /prinsipal sāhab tashrīf rakhīyee/ ‘Principal sir, please be seated’ 11. /āiyee, tashrīf lāiyee/ ‘Come and sit down’ 12. /moulvi sāhab tashrīf rakhiyee/ ‘Molvi sahab, (one who teaches theology in Madrasa) Please be seated’ 13. /āiyee māsTar sāhab, ājkal āpkā patā nahī chal rahā hai/ ‘Teacher Sir, where are you now a days?’
The phrases (expressions) of greeting regarding enquiring one’s health is invariably used in Urdu community (Muslim Community), particularly among educated people. Let us consider the expressions that have been observed:
14. /abbu jān āp ki tabīyat kaisi hai/ ‘Father, how is your health now’? 15. /ammi jān āp ki tabīyat kaisi hai/ ‘Mother, how is your health’? 16. /kiya hāl hai beeTī/ ‘How are you daughter’? 17. /beeTī, kiya hāl hai/ ‘Daughter, how are you’? 18. /ammi jān āp kaisi haiN/ ‘mother, how are you’?
Besides, there are also some modes of greeting that are frequently used by Urdu speakers only, and are not found in other language community. The following types of greetings are used by near and dear ones when they meet each other after a long time:
19. /māshāallā(h) āp too xūb lag rahe haiN/ ‘You are looking very good by the grace of Allah (God)’ 20. /alhamdoolīllā(h) āp too bilkul badal gaee/ ‘Thank God (Allah) you have completely changed’ 21. /alhamdoolīllā(h) āp too paihlee see bahut seehat mand lag rahee haiN/ ‘Thank God you are looking very healthy now’ 22. /āp paihlee see itnā badal gaee ki mai āpkoo paihchān na sakā/ ‘You have changed so much that I could not recognize you’
It is very common to find that in Urdu community that while addressing a religious gathering or an audience or a congregation, such types of greetings are used in which the glory of Allah (God) is highly praised. In this community blessings in the name of Allah (God) are also used as modes of greeting. For example:
23. /allāh ham sab kī hifāzat farmāyee/ ‘May Allah(God) protect us all’ 24. /allāh āp kee neek irādooN koo qabūl farmāyee/ ‘May Allah(God) accepts your good determinations’! 25. /allāh āp ki murādooN koo pūra karee/ ‘May Allah (God) fulfils your wishes’! 26. /allāh āp koo neek sāleeh aulād dee/ ‘May Allah (God) gives you virtuous son/daughter’! 27. /allāh āp koo jazāee Xair dee/ ‘May Allah (God) gives you reward’ 28. /allāh) āp kī neek tamannāooN koo pūrā karee/ ‘May Allah (God) fulfills your good wishes’! 29. /allāh āp koo kāmyāb karee/ ‘May Allah (God) gives you success’! 30. /allāh āp koo seehat, zindagi dee/ ‘May Allah (God) gives you health and life’! 31. /allāh āp koo Xūsh rakkhee/ ‘May Allah(God) keeps you happy’ 32. /allāh āp kī hifāzat farmāyee/ ‘May Allah(God) protect you’ 33. /allāh āp kā bhalā karee/ ‘May Allah (God) bestows blessing on you’! 34. /allāh ham sab kee is majlis mee baiThnee koo qubūl farmāyee/ ‘May Allah(God) accepts the sitting of all of us in this gathering’! 35. /allāh ham sab kee baiThnee koo qubul farmāyee/ ‘May Allah (God) accepts the sitting of all of us’!
In the non-Urdu speech community, when the younger people bow down to touch the feet of the elder ones, in response to this, the elders give their blessings with reference to the greeter’s health, prosperity and longevity. The following utterances (expressions) are used in Hindi speaking community for this purpose.
36. /jug jug jīoo meeree lāl/ ‘May you live long, my son’ 37. /bhagwān tumhee sukhī rakhee/ ‘May God keep you happy’! 38. /sūkhi raho beetā/ ‘Be happy son’!
In Urdu speaking community the forms assalām-o-alaikūm or salāmooalaikūm convey a wide range of meaning for the greetee including blessings for good health, prosperity and longevity. In response to the greeter’s form assalām-o-alaikūm the greetee says vālaikūmassalām, which means the greetee also returns the same blessing to the greeter. There is no difference in the meanings of feelings. Due to this reason we normally do not observe more expressions between the two persons.
Urdu speaking community- Correlation between Modes of Greetings and Modes of Address: In Urdu speech community, the modes of greeting are deeply correlated with the modes of address. The modes of greeting are used before a conversation is started and before parting. The greeting forms are mostly used first by the youngsters for elders or by juniors to seniors. The greetee then reciprocates by the use of appropriate modes of greeting. The modes of address can be initiated by any participant irrespective of his age, status, etc. Generally, modes of address are used alongwith the modes of greetings. The forms of address may either precede or follow the greeting forms:
| Modes of Address | + | Verbal Greetings |
| /ammi jān / abbu jān/ ‘mother/father’ | + | assalāmoalaikūm/salāmoalaikūm |
| /maineejar sāb/ ‘Mr. Manager’ | + | salāmoalaikūm |
| /aslambhāi/ ‘Aslam, brother’ | + | salāmoalaikūm |
| /vakīl sāb/ ‘Mr. Lawyer’ | + | salāmoalaikūm/assalāmoalaikūm |
| /bashīr miyān/ ‘Mr. Bashir’ | + | salāmoalaikūm |
| ‘bashir’ ‘a name’ | + | salāmoalaikūm |
| /bhābī/ ‘brother’s wife’ | + | assalāmoalaikūm/salāmoalaikūm |
| /āpā/ ‘sister’ | + | assalāmoalaikūm, salāmoalaikūm |
| /xālā/ ‘mother’s sister’ | + | assalāmoalaikūm, salāmoalaikūm |
| /nānīN/mumāni/ ‘mother’s mother/mother’s brother’s wife’ | + | assalāmoalaikūm, salāmoalaikūm |
| Verbal Greetings | + | Modes of Address |
| assalāmoalaikūm | + | /bhāi jān/ ‘brother’ |
| assalāmoalaikūm | + | /abba jān/, /amma jān/, /abbu jān/, /ammi jān/, /abba ji/, /amma ji/ ‘father/mother’ |
| assalāmoalaikūm | + | /maulvi sāb/ ‘one who teaches theology in a madarsa (Islamic Institution) |
| assalāmoalaikūm | + | /vakīl sāb/ ‘Advocate Sir’ |
| assalāmoalaikūm | + | /maneejar sāb/ ‘Manager Sir’ |
| assalāmoalaikūm | + | /DākTar sāb/ ‘Doctor Sir’ |
| ādābarz | + | /gupta ji/ ‘a name’ /mishra ji/ ‘a name’ /panDit ji/ ‘a priest’ |
Note: It is to be pointed out here that the greeting form assalām-o-alaikūm < Insert Picture > is not static in its use. The another varied form ssalām-o-alaikūm < Insert Picture > is also used frequently by the Urdu speaker (greeter) in all kinds of situations. These two greeting forms are mutually exclusive. But it is to be noted here that in a very formal gathering like jalsā ‘gala’, religious ceremony and at other formal occasions, the form assalām-o-alaikūm < Insert Picture > is generally used by the greeter.
chhaTi: Sixth day after the birth of a child.
haqiqā or aqĩqā: A goat is butchered after the birth of a child to pray for his/her good health.
Xatnā: This is circumcision which is common among the Jews also.
nāk or kān chhedāī: Ear or nose of a girl is pearced
chillā: Fortieth day after the birth of a child
maktab or bismillāh: This ceremony is performed when a child attains four years, four months and four days of age for the purpose of initiating him/her to religious education.
nashrā: A ceremony when a child finishes his/her holy Qurān.
maNgnī: Engagement
Dholkī: Songs of marriage, which are sung accompanied by drum sound.
ubTan and mānjhā: A ceremony before marriage in which the bride and the groom wear yellow clothes in their respective homes.
menhdi: A ceremony after mānjhā and just before marriage in which henna is put on bride’s hands and feet.
bārāt: The day of marriage.
aqd nikāh: This is compulsory in Islam, which is performed by moulvi in the presence of two witnesses to obtain consent for marriage from the bride. Before performing nikha, there is a deliverance of speech, called xutbae nikāh.
meher: This is referred to as ‘Dower’ where the groom gives money to the bride. The amount of meher is fixed in consultation with the family members of both the side. Meher is of two kinds: meher majal and meher m’ajal.
palaT: Dress materials sent by the family of the bride.
jalwāh: When the face of the bride is shown to the groom.
rūnumaī: When the face of the bride is shown to relatives, friends and other guests.
salāmi: Token of gift in cash given to the groom, which is kept on a doctorated tray.
hijla ‘arūsī: Room of the bride, which is fully decorated for the purpose of keeping the groom and bride together.
ruXatī: Departure when the groom takes the bride to his house.
walimā: Reception (Function in bridegroom’s home the next day when the bride is brought home)
rāsta roknā gal sekāī pāoN dhulaī chāl chalāī
tijā: The recitation of the holy Qurān followed by lunch/dinner on the third day after the death of a person.
desvāN: The recitation of the holy Qurān followed by lunch/ dinner on the ninth day of the death of a person.
bīsvāN: The recitation of the holy Qurān followd by lunch/ dinner on the nineteenth day of the death of a person.
chhalīsvāN or chhelum: The recitation of the holy Qurān followed by lunch/ dinner on the thirteenth day of the death of a person.
barsī: The recitation of the holy Qurān (Qurān khwāni) followed by lunch / dinner every year commemorating the death of a person.
sāri shalwār sūT Gharārā lehngā cunni blauz shakukā choli angiā kurti kurtā dupaTTā shamīs frak sharārāh shāl peTikoT, ebāyah
kurtā pājamā pathānī suT sherwāni or echkan Topi āRā pājamā ebā and pagRī shāl angrakhā qemīs koT patlūn chuRidār mozā nāgrā rumāl lungī baniyān
māng Tikā nakh zeb jhūmar nath nāk ki kīl
bijlī jhūmak īyaing Taps bali pattā ring
gulobend sat laRā neklas gulāb hār panch laRā mālaā tīn laRā mālā campā kalī hanslī lākiT haraiya jugnu
angushtari angūThī chhallā arsī
kaRā pahuncī kangan chuRiyān dast band paTri baTānā, bresleT bāzū band jaushan naunaggā
kamar zeb kamar dhani
pāzeb chherā kaRa
bichhiyā
1. āp əŗosən lərẽ ‘uselessly indulging in a fight or heated argument’ 2. āpādhāpi ‘ mischief’ 3. āpe se bāhər hōnā ‘ extremely angry’ 4. āţh āţh ā̃su ronā ‘ to feel repentant’ 5. ādhe ka teha kərnā ‘ to make less and less’ 6. ārsi ţūţnā ‘ extremely ugly’ 7. asman pər uŗna ‘ arrogant’ 8. ā̃kh ka pani ‘ used for shyness’ 9. əbhi kəcca bərtən hai ‘ who does’nt have experiences in life, usually used for young girls’ 10. əchūta pindā ‘ used for a virgin girl and when used for children it means that child has never had measles, chicken-po or anything kind’ 11. əsəl Xεr ‘ with safety’ 12. əfrā tefrī ‘ cause a state of disorder’ 13. əllāh rəkhe ‘ a kind of best wishes with the name of God’ 14. əllāh kī mār ‘ a kind of curse’ 15. olā hona ‘ a thing which is cold like ice’ 16. jəhənnum mẽ jāe ‘ used to show disconcern about someone or some thing’ 17. jhənḍe per chəŗhānā ‘ to defame some one’ 18. ji bəţnā ‘ very light entertainment’ 19. ji jəlānā ‘ to cause irritation 20. ji kā duŠman ‘ used for an enemy who is after ones life’ 21. chāder utarnā ‘ to put off the veil’ 22. chā̃di kā pεr ‘ blessed feet’ 23. chəlti həva se ləŗnā ‘ to fight with people without any reason’ 24. chhāti ţhənḍī kərnā ‘ to take revenge’ 25. hāl xərāb hōnā ‘ to become very poor’ 26. hāl se behāl hōnā ‘ to become upset’ 27. Xālāji kā ghər nəhi ‘ a difficult task’ 28. Xāli xuli ‘ without any money’ 29. Xəbər ko bhejnā ‘ to enquire about someone’s health’ 30. Xudā səmjhe ‘ a kind of curse’ 31. dukhŗā pitnā ‘ to discuss ones problems with everyone’ 32. dildbər ānā ‘ just to cry’ 33. rāj suhāg qayem rəhe ‘ a kind of blessing about some one’s husband’
/idulfitr/ ‘First day of the month of Shawal immediately after Ramazan’ /iduzzuhā/ ‘Tenth day of the month of ZilHij’ /bārawafāt/ ‘Twelfth day of the month of Rabi-ul-awwal and the birthday of the Prophet Mohammad’ /shabeebarāt/ ‘Fourteenth day of the month of Shabān’ /āshūrah/ ‘Tenth day of the month of moharram and the day of martyrdom of Hazrat Imam Hussain, the grandson of Prophet Mohammad’ /hooli/ ‘Festival of colours’ /dipāvalī/ ‘Festival of lights and crackers’ /janmāshTmī/ ‘The birthday of Lord Krishan’ /rāmnavmī/ ‘The birthday of Lord Ram’ /dasheerā/ ‘A celebration of Good over evil’ /rakshābandhan/ ‘The festival of brother and sister’ /kaRvāchaut/ ‘The fast that wives keep for the well being of their husbands’ /krismas/ ‘The birthday of Jesus Criest’ /guD frāiDee/ ‘last Friday of the fast of Christians in the month of April’
Copyright CIIL-India Mysore